For the final part in this series concerning self-love, I will give you 12 tips and suggestions that you can begin doing right away to gain some of the mental and physical benefits that we learned about in Part 2.
12 simple tips and activity suggestions to help you on your path:
· Mindfulness.
People with more self-love have a better understanding of what they think, feel and want. Mindfulness encompasses being fully present, non-judgmental, and aware of what is going on in and around us. Suggestion: Try to live in the moment, just for a moment every day.
· Live intentionally.
When you live with purpose and design, you will accept and love yourself more. Your purpose doesn’t have to be completely clear to you. Tip: If you are living with the intention of having a meaningful and healthy life, you will make decisions to support this. You are then able to feel good about yourself in making the choices that support this and you can love yourself more as you see accomplishments towards living your intentions.
· Gratitude Journal.
In staying present through self-love practice we can avoid getting swept up in out past or future plans which can cause hopelessness, stress or anxiety. A gratitude journal keeps you grounded by reminding you of what you have to be thankful for right now. Suggestion: Every day write at least one thing that you are grateful for that day.
· Practicing good self-care.
When you love yourself more, you automatically take better care of your basic needs. You then nourish yourself daily through healthy choices concerning nutrition and activities like exercising, proper sleep, intimacy and healthy social interactions. Tip: Try to make choices that better serve your whole self.
· Limit time on social media.
A main component of self-love is refraining from self-judgement and comparing ourselves to others. Social media is an easy trap to fall into where people often find themselves unconsciously making comparisons to the seemingly perfect person on social media. This decreases their self-esteem, and can increase feelings of loneliness, anxiety, depression and fear of missing out. Suggestion: Schedule an hour or more every evening where you put the phone or tablet down, turn off the computer and possibly connect with someone else or just spend time with yourself doing what you enjoy doing.
· Surround yourself with people you feel good with.
Be picky about who you spend your time with- don’t give it away in the spirit of mercy. There is a famous quote by Jim Rohn “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Tip: Think about them and choose wisely- find people that inspire you, that fill you up and want what is best for you.
· Taking action on need rather than want.
Suggestion: Try to focus on what you need and turn away from the automatic behavior patterns of following what you want that lessen self-love, get you in trouble and/or keep you stuck in the past.
· Making room for healthy habits.
Start truly caring for yourself by choosing to focus on what you eat, what you spend time doing and how you exercise simply because you care about you. Tip: Create habits that are healthy, not just mentally but also emotionally.
· Be kind, patient, compassionate and gentle with yourself.
Suggestion: Treat yourself as you would a friend in a time of need. Stop the negative self-talk. Constantly beating yourself up over shortcomings or mistakes only leads to making yourself feel helpless, worthless with less motivation to change. Forgive yourself for your mistakes and learn and grow from them- this way they will not be failures but lessons.
· Give yourself a compliment every day.
This helps us to shift our thinking about ourselves to a positive mindset. Tip: You can always leave yourself a Post-it note or a reminder on your phone (IE ‘you are doing great’) if you feel funny talking to yourself.
· Celebrate small wins.
It is fine to have lofty goals or dreams for ourselves. But people can set harsh expectations for themselves and get caught up in what society is demanding of them, then criticize themselves for not achieving those expectations. Tip: By having realistic expectations with small achievable goals that are aligned with our needs, values and wants we are able to complete these goals and feel accomplished and motivated to keep going towards that lofty goal.
· Let go.
When we hold onto our negativity, or let our rumination over the negative thoughts or feelings get a hold of us we can get stuck with those negative thoughts and be held down by them. Suggestion: Instead of getting stuck, try to let go of the past and focus on the present moment.
Note- This goes for toxic people as well. If there is someone that is bringing toxicity into your life and they won’t take responsibility for it, that might mean that you need to step away from them. Don’t be afraid to do this, it is liberating and important for your health, even though it might be painful as well.
You can improve your inner connection through learning to love yourself and practicing self-love. It is a practice and it will not happen overnight, but it is essential if you want to develop a strong connection, not just with yourself, but with other people.
If you made it through this whole series, wonderful! … but don’t stop there. My final suggestion is don’t just think that was interesting and some good advice and you’ll get to it later, choose a few of the tips and suggestions from above that spoke to you and try to put them in action. As you see and feel improvements adding a few more in at some point will not seem so difficult!
References:
Next time:
Stay tuned for my next blog in 2 weeks where we discuss Gratitude, its benefits, aspects and how to begin its practice.
Related Post Links: Self-Love Part 1:
Self-Love Part 2:
Author: Jen Hassaj | 3-22-23
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